Feline Eyes are Watching You

Meine Katze ist auf einer Diät. Cleo betrachtet mich mit den böse Augen und erklärt mir mit ihrem Blick des Ekels, den sie keine das einzige ist, das Kalorien schneiden muß. Wenn nur sie warten würde, bis ich mit der Eiscreme fertig, würde ich sie nicht so persönlich nehmen.

Aus irgendeinem Grund produziert diese Diät sehr scharfe Blähung. Während ich in der Dunkelheit sitze, dieses Stück schreibend, treiben ihre tötlich Gerüche in Richtung zu meiner Nase. Zuerst dachte ich, daß es ein Geist war. Es ist eine bessere Erklärung für den Geruch. Sie und ich sind allein und ich bin fast positive sein nicht ich.


Let me sleep, biatch Posted by Picasa

This is what I wanted to say:

My cat is on a diet. Cleo looks at me with evil eyes, telling me with her look of disgust that she is no the only one that needs to cut calories. If only she would wait until I was done with the ice cream, I wouldn’t take it so personally.

For some reason, this diet produces very pungent flatulence. As I sit in the dark, writing this piece, her smelly odors drift towards my nose. At first I thought it was a ghost. It’s a better explanation for the odor. She and I are alone and I’m almost positive it’s not me.

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “Feline Eyes are Watching You

  1. yeah, but don’t ask me to speak it. I have to be drunk to open up that part of my brain. Oktoberfest was a big conversation for me. I spoke to everyone. I was misunderstood a lot, but i spoke for hours.

  2. My deepest R.E.S.P.E.C.T.!

    This one should be proposed for the Grimme-Award (our national Oscar for >>cutting edge< < use of language!): "Aus irgendeinem Grund produziert diese Diät sehr scharfe Blähung." Scharf!

  3. Hey! I really like it, that’s no joke! That was one of the best usages of our language I’ve read for a long time :-). Go on writing in German!
    It was more fun reading this (please take it as a _real_ compliment) than many Essays of my fellow countrymen!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s