Kannst du meinen Boppes küssen oder darfst du meinen Boppes küssen?

So much has happened in the last two days, I don’t know where to begin.  

First, I passed my test.  I have an issue with the usage of kann vs darf, but I’ll have to let that go.  It was only two points, right?  I’ve had so many aggravating experiences this week that this would seem like small potatoes, but its not.  It just sticks in my craw.

I’m in the next level regardless.  It’s hard.  I understood very little today and will have to study a lot tonight so that tomorrow can/may be a better day.  

All members of the Ladies of Leisure League made it to the next level, which is nice.  Only one of the Somali women moved on with us and the British guy stayed back.  Sadly, Sweet Cheeks’ visa ran out and she had to go back to the Ukraine. The priest went back to Poland.

Second, our Bulthaup kitchen needs another repair after one year and our salesman is refusing the warranty.  Long story, but they neglected to re-measure the new construction before ordering and ordered one cabinet that didn’t fit.  It was clearly a supplier error.  

They asked us to chip in to pay for it.  As we had already paid a kings ransom, it wasn’t our fault, we said at the time we would not pay for the error and we signed nothing, we are not going to pay for it.

Now they are refusing service even though they have repaired this problem and others during the last year.  The explanation is that even though it was not our fault, they figure it’s cheaper for us to pay them than for us to sue them.  Those were Herr Schmiedel’s exact words.

I will burn those euros before I will give it to Kuchen Schmiedel.  I will wipe my butt and flush those euros first.  I will tear them into little pieces and use them for confetti before I pay those extortionists.  So we’re suing.  

An aside, Bulthaup has beautifully styled kitchens, but functionally, Bulthaup is no better than other WAY less expensive Sysmatic or even Ikea.  We’ve had so many problems with this kitchen and we’ve had it a year. Kitchens are supposed to last a bit longer, right?

Third, I had a medical situation that required swift outpatient surgery.  Everything seems to be fine now.  I’ll have the pathology reports back tomorrow, but we do not anticipate any problems.  Given the fact my sister has cancer, my mother died of cancer and my dad survived colon cancer, when a doctor finds an unusual tumor, one tends to worry.

The real issue now is the Dr. and the facility. The doctors did not use gloves when examining me or hooking up the IV.   I was under anesthesia so I don’t know if gloves were used for the surgery.  The recovery room contained two Ikea beds with dirty sheets and duvets. There was blood on the sheets from someone else that had been there before me.   I asked if I could leave and the nurse said I’d go home in a couple of hours, but the whole thing was so filthy I waited until I was no longer dizzy and dressed. I went to the waiting room to find Markus and demanded to go home immediately.

The surgeon took one more look, without gloves, and warned me of a narcosis relapse.

When they drew blood they didn’t wear gloves AND had a blood pressure cuff on.  This ended up with my blood squirting all over the room, down my arm, on to the nurse and the anesthesiologist himself. No one had any sort of protection.  I was in a rather delicate position physically, very scared and understanding very little of what they were saying or I would have said something.  I didn’t know if this was a cultural difference or a sign of a bad situation.  It was one of those “I hate this, I’m totally helpless, I don’t know what to do” moments that made me yearn for the US.

Now I’m flipping out about contracting something from the Drs.  I have no idea what to do at this point.  I’ve cancelled my follow appt with this surgery center and will follow up with my regular Dr.  

Next time I’ll go to our TierÄrztin.  Her office is a lot cleaner and so are her hands.  Bloody Metzgerei.

On a lighter note, there is an American guy in my school who claims to be French.  

Monday we did a little exercise with the GK I thru III classes.  We had to interview another student and then introduce that person to the rest of the class.  When I walked in to the room, there was this one guy who stood out.  His name is Adrian.

As an American living abroad, I can out pick another American in crowd.  Idiosyncrasies that we take for normal behavior in the states, tends to stand out in Europe.  One of the many ways new Ami Expats stand out is in our arrogance.  The white sneakers are another, but it’s our arrogance that really irritates the natives.

This guy Adrian had arrogance in spades.  SPADES, I tell you. Just the way he walked in the room was American.  The way he was chatting up the hot Italian, the way he proudly mispronounced every German word he spoke

I’m really good with my Amidar.  And the French, I have found, have a very different type of arrogance.  Americans tend to be antagonistically arrogant.  Sparky calls it proactive arrogance, but you get the drift.  It’s really clarified if you look at Bush vs. Chirac.

His partner, a super hot Italian, introduced him as Adrian from France.  Then he himself explains he’s been in Germany for 1 month.

Adrian is totally American.  I don’t know his story, but he claims to be French, born and raised. A Frenchman would not speak German with an American English accent.  

Class ended and I went to wait for Sparky in the car.  Adrian came out and started walking towards his car.  As soon as he saw me, the only American in the room earlier, he slowed down.  I kid you not.  He slowed down until it was obvious I wasn’t going anywhere.

As he walked toward his American model Toyota Tercel, he nodded in acknowledgement.  The car had American civilian military plates.
What is the French word for Poser?

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11 thoughts on “Kannst du meinen Boppes küssen oder darfst du meinen Boppes küssen?

  1. 1)Congratulations on passing your test!! I’ve been thinking about the kann/darf issue and have come to the conclusion that if you go one step lower in the politeness scale in German than you would in English, you’re on the right track. I think.

    2) Oh my god – that clinic sounds awful and I hope you’re OK. I’m mailing you ASAP

    3) Make those suckers pay for your kitchen – it’s their fault.

    4) Adrian deserves to be outed! Who does he think he’s kidding? He’s probably Jersey or something.

  2. Congrats on the test.

    As far as your medical situation goes, that sounds awful. I have TK and hope it’s better than yours. I didn’t experience any of what you did when I had my oral surgery a few months ago, and hope I don’t if I have to have some kind of real surgery. I hope you’re feeling better.

    The kitchen? All I can say is that you’re right. Also, before you flush Euros down the toilet, email them to me (before you wipe your butt with them).

    The Adrian thing made me laugh. What an idiot. However, I had a girl from Thailand in my first German class that spoke very good American accented English, and she did sound American when she spoke German.

  3. Oh, and what do American civilian military plates start with? The only ones I know of are military plates that either start with HK or AD (Germans laugh at the AD ones and say they mean ‘American Driver’).

  4. Congrats on passing the exam. Hope all goes well with the doctors.
    This Adrian dude sounds a bit of a wanker to be honest! 🙂
    I await further installments 🙂

  5. Hope you’re doing ok.

    Looks like I’ll be going sneaker shopping this weekend, I thought it was just my terrible German that was giving me away as an American.

  6. That Bulthaup kitchen incident reminds me of how when we lived in Munich years ago we had constant problems with the heating. Basically, the colder it got, the colder it got. It only worked in warm weather. I called and called the landlord with few results for two years. Right after we moved out and a German couple moved in, they discovered that the thermostat had been installed upside down. They got it fixed in a week– just by calling twenty times a day and making total nuisances of themselves. Maybe that is what it takes.

    About the doctors not using gloves– this is a problem in France too. When I first moved to Paris, my kids got lice and worms the first month. The doctor examined them for WORMS and then not only didn’t wash his hands but shook mine! I fled to a nearby bathroom and scrubbed, then changed doctors. It took me several tries and even now I notice that the kids’ doctor’s office doesn’t have a sink in the WC!

    I’m enjoying your blog. Hope the health problems turn out to be unimportant. Let us know.

  7. Congrats for passing the test! 🙂

    Erm….the doc story is a bit gross…are you sure you weren’t at a “Tirearzt” ;D …ahh…I will never ever go to that doc…. 😀

    The Adrian story is great! He can’t be French cause his name isn’t any French either! It’dbe something like Adrien or whatever! :))
    Well maybe he claimed to be French cause France and Germany are kinda closer as USA and Germany…god knows….hehe it’s kinda funny. Maybe you should ask him something French next time? Let’s see what he’ll answer! hehe

  8. Wow. The doc thing sounds pretty bloody, even for germany. Hope your insurance allows you to find someone more your hygenic style.

  9. thanks for all the well wishes. I’m totally going to the frankfurt uni hospital for any/everything now. No more village idiots.

    I will out Adrian. I just have to find the right time, the cad. He and the hot italian seem to be chumming it up so i doubt he’s using his american girlfriend’s car. I should probably pay more attention to my german than to the people around me, but they are so much more interesting.

    stay tuned…

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