Not in any particular order.
1. When I like a song, I have to listen to it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over. This sometimes drives friends, lovers and neighbors to want to hurt me.
Right now it’s Coldplay’s Viva la Vida. Sorry, Sparks. I just like the triumph first thing in the morn.
2. My first inclination when I walk in the door is to drop my shoes and clothing. Living with a partner means giving up some of these habits. I leave the clothing on, but drop the shoes then forbid Sparky from moving them. All he wants to do it put them in the same place and at a 90 degree angle. I forbid it. A little rebellion at his need for order.
3. Contrary to the shoes, I must wake up to a clean kitchen. This means cleaning it at night. Waking to dishes in the sink… Ooh watch out. Best you put that plate in the dishwasher before I get up.
4. When I’m not dancing with Insomnia at night, I usually wake up way too chipper. It would be fine if I left others to their own personal wake up moods and modes, but no. I don’t. I’ll serenade you with made up little ditties until you want to throttle me. Then I’ll skip sprightly away while you contemplate the 50,000 ways you’d like to kill me.
5. I’m tactile. I must touch stuff. Especially stuff that is not mine. Especially if there is a little sign that says “Do Not Touch”. Buttons are actually the worst for me. Never show me a button I’m not allowed to push. I have no self control. This has actually gotten me into some trouble if you can imagine.
6. When I need attention, I need it Right. This. Second. I’m 36 and I’ve never really learned how to be patient when it comes to this need. Sparky thinks it’s because I was Cry It Out* baby.
7. I’m right more often than I’m wrong. This is a gift and a curse.
8. I suffer from an illness called “Let Me Do It” Syndrome. Sometimes this is also referred to as “I Can Obviously Do It Better, Faster or More Completely, You Dolt” Disorder. It’s hereditary. My entire maternal line is afflicted. However, in my defense, Sparky suffers from Pedantic Kraut Sickness.
9. I like to be on time for things which often means being early as I anticipate possible obstacles to my punctuality including getting people off their asses and out the door. This is in direct conflict with every single person in my life that I love being more of the “Eh, we’ll get there when we get there” variety.
9. Math is more of a fluid concept for me.
When I asked Sparky to add to this list, his first and immediate response was to laugh heartily. “You are an angry, angry bitch. Is that what you mean?”
Sparky is no longer has to worry about how difficult it is to live with me. Or anyone else for that matter.